Hi guys and welcome to another quick flash! As per usual the prompt is in bold. I hope you enjoy this brief flash. Have a great day!
Better off alone
He sunk his hands into his hair and closed his eyes. His head pounded. Each thump drilling into his brains like Alex’s words drilled into his heart the night before. He knew that dinner wouldn’t be pleasant after Alex texted him that they had to talk, but he never expected what followed.
Ben bit into his lasagna and closed his eyes in a vain attempt to savor the food. Alex had been looking at him strangely ever since they’d arrived. They’d made small talk and finally fallen silent. His gut twisted.
“Ben, I, we, I—“
His eyes snapped open.
Gently, Alex rested his fork on the plate. Ben’s heart fluttered as he noticed that the other man had barely eaten.
“What is it?” he whispered.
Alex splayed his hands on the table. Strong hands. Hands Ben had felt on his flesh hundreds of times. Long, soft fingers that had run through his hair in a caress or pulled at the strands in a moment of passion. Hands that weren’t used to hard labor or being out in the sun. Hands that were radically different from his but that he loved regardless.
“I don’t fit in your life.”
Ben’s gaze slid to Alex’s face. His blue eyes were wide, fixed not on him but on his half-empty glass of wine. Ben swallowed.
“We’ve been dating for six months, Alex. I thought—“
“Ben, no, listen.”
Blue eyes slid to his face and dropped again. “It’s not you. You’re great. You’re caring, loving, funny, you’re any man’s dreams but I—“ Alex let out a heavy sigh. “I need to get my shit together and with you—“
““You’re giving me the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ excuse?” Ben blurted, sudden anger making his back burn. He’d heard that bull shit before. Men that wooed him, used him and threw him out like a piece of cheap trash. He’d thought Alex was different. Heck, they’d been together for six months and they’d done more than just fuck. He thought they’d had a connection. Clearly he’d been wrong.
“Ben please, it’s not an excuse. It really is me. I—“
“Save it, Alexander.” Ben shoved his seat backwards. He reached for his wallet to pay for his half of the meal but halfway there, changed his mind. “You know what, you can pay for dinner. Asshole.”
He saw the pain flash across Alex’s blue eyes and heard the break in his voice, but he shook his head. He wouldn’t be fooled again. Other men had done the same. Pleaded with their eyes for him to understand and garnered a last pity fuck. Damn. He was pitiable. Taking a deep breath he opened his eyes and placed his palms on his thighs. Enough. He wouldn’t be made fun of again. Love was clearly out of the cards for him. He had to stay strong and move on. Live his life to the fullest without another man at his side. He was capable of that. He knew he was. Love wasn’t a necessity. People lived without it all the time and so would he.
“Fuck y’all,” he said softly. He plastered a smile on his face and raised his head. Soft sunlight streamed through the curtains. A new day meant a new beginning. Time to make the most out of his life. He was better off alone.
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